Rage
by charis2770
Summary: Axel is having a very bad day. Saix makes things worse. A lot of flowers pay the price. Roxas, typically, sticks his nose in only this time he gets a lot more than he bargains for. While this story is not exactly explicit, it contains a sequence that starts out with dubious consent. However, it rapidly turns into lemons and feels. Mature themes and some explicit language. AkuRoku


Flowers, he thinks darkly, are more fun to burn than wood. He likes watching them wither and turn brown, curling in upon themselves as though they might escape the flames. This is, of course, futile. Fire is a great equalizer. It's an equal opportunity killer. He realizes he's being both childish and a little macabre, but he doesn't care. He doesn't like Marluxia anyway, and the traitor isn't here to bemoan the loss of his precious flowers anyway. With a molten green glare, he incinerates another clump of blossoms. He has no idea whether they are begonias or pansies or daisies or…whatever. He could not possibly care less. They smell sort of interesting when they burn. A little like incense.

Axel thinks he's being manipulated. This pisses him off. Partly this is because he does not like being manipulated. Partly it is because he knows he hasn't the patience to analyze the situation clearly enough to really get to the bottom of it and thus sees no way to avoid the manipulation without out and out rebellion. He's not ready for that, not yet.

Xemnas, he thinks angrily, turning more pansies or irises or tulips into ash. How they follow him just like obedient little sheep. All except the three in Castle Oblivion, of course, and Axel thinks it's entirely likely he's been manipulated into handling THAT situation too. Xemnas, with his plans and promises and his blue-fucking-haired- lapdog. Damn Saix anyway for trying to play the friend card on him when now is the one time in his life he can't afford to let that matter. Oh god, he mourns this fact too. Part of the reason he's starting to think the Superior is full of shit is that if he really hadn't any heart, there's no way he'd be struggling so much with all these fucking feelings. How could he agonize over not being able to trust Saix anymore because his best friend is so deep in Xemnas' goddamned pockets that it's a wonder Saix doesn't change his name to…how do you fit an X into "toilet paper?" "Toxtile Rexpap?" Anyway, into that, so he can wipe Xemnas' ass for him. Why why WHY if he's heartless does poor broken dolly Xion tug at that place in his chest so it hurts and he wants so badly to protect her it makes his teeth ache? And most of all, if his heart has actually been taken from him and he is now an unfeeling soldier in Xemnas' Army of Darkness or whatever the hell they are….if it's true then how can he be tying himself in knots over one naïve foolish boy who acts one shitcan load of a lot like he feels the same way? Christ, thinking about Roxas makes his palms itch. A soft feral growl trickles up from his throat and out through his teeth as he blasts another patch of blossoms.

He senses rather than hears or feels the darkness portal opening behind him. He akins the sensation to biting tinfoil, only not really a feeling, or not exactly. It's just a sense of something sharp and torn and black, and he can always feel them when they open, so long as they aren't too far away. He doesn't know if the others can feel them or not, in this invisible way that he senses them. He's facing the portal when Saix steps through it, and he grits his teeth because now is really not a good time.

"Superior says that if you _must_ incinerate foliage, to please take yourself to Wonderland and do it. You're wrecking the castle grounds," says Saix coolly.

Well. That just does it. With no warning at all, he hurls a hand towards his friend and fireballs him. Saix tumbles backwards like pieces of kindling, his hair and coat smoking with the blast, and fetches up against a topiary of what he's nearly sure is a hippopotamus, blinking at him in shock. He's too stunned and too injured to conjure his claymore. Which, Axel muses darkly to himself, does _TOO_ look like a damn banjo! He steps over Saix and stomps away.

"Toady," he snarls over his shoulder as he goes. "Brown-noser. _Asslicker._"

He opens his own portal and vanishes.

Emerging in the heart of Fragment Crossing, Axel wanders aimlessly among the empty buildings, not really seeing any of them. There's not much he can burn here, so he paces, hoping to just wear the mad out so he can get back to doing his job. Well, once he figures out what he wants it to be.

"Axel!" calls a voice from one of the alleys. He hears running feet and turns to face the right direction. As if he needed the sound to orient on the voice. Roxas pulls at him like he is a compass needle and Roxas is north. His voice is joyous, pleased at encountering his friend here. When he bursts from the alley, he is smiling. Axel closes his eyes for a moment and tries to throttle down his rage. He's not doing a very good job.

"You don't want to be here right now, Roxy," he says tersely, and turns on his heel to continue pacing. Roxas looks bewildered, and follows him. Little shit never has known what was good for him.

"Axel," he says in his clear, lovely tenor voice which makes Axel's mouth pool with saliva. Jesus, he wants to bite him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. You need to leave me alone right now."

"Friends don't leave each other alone when one's hurting," says Roxas staunchly. Oh God. He halts in his tracks and whirls to face the younger boy.

"Is that what we are?" he sneers. "Friends? I'm not a very healthy friend for you to have Roxy, and you should know that by now. I don't play well with others. And Roxy? The ways I want to play with you? They're not very nice. Go. Away."

Roxas, predictably, does not go away. He swallows, and his eyes are shining at Axel like stars. His lips part and he takes a deep breath.

"Axel," he whispers, and his lashes lower over his aquamarine eyes in a sweep of embarrassed modesty. "I….I want to…" he gulps and Axel sees a flush staining his cheeks. Shit, he's adorable. Today, this just pisses Axel off more. Roxas' next words turn his world on its ear. "I want to….play with you too," he breathes. Well hell.

"No," say Axel with great certainty. "You don't."

"I…I think about you all the time," gasps Roxas, rushing to get the words out, only now he's looking up at Axel with sincerity shining in his eyes and his heart in his fucking mouth. "I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I can't help it. I can hardly sleep at night. You're….you're not just my best friend. Axel…I…"

"Stop," snarls Axel, rage darkening his gaze so that he sees Roxas through a haze of red and black. The boy has no idea what he's saying, what it means to Axel, and that he would come out with this now, when Axel can't bear his own company, let alone anybody else's, and knows all he could do would be to hurt Roxas in his own rage and need and confusion. There is enough of sanity left in him to try to stop this particular train wreck from happening before it is too late.

Roxas, again predictably, simply _must_ utter a phrase that makes too late a moot point.

"I want you," he whispers miserably, desperately, but with hope in his eyes and a trembling smile on his lips. Axel wants to bite that mouth, wants to wipe the smile off and hear Roxas scream for him. All the blood in his body rushes to his center and he closes his eyes briefly in a mute prayer to whatever misbegotten god might be listening. Clearly, none of them are paying attention at all, because adding lust to his rage pushes Axel over an edge he's been dancing on for a long time now. Roxas takes a step towards him, one hand held out towards him, pleadingly. Axel can smell him, he's so close, and the scent of his friend is maddening, and fuels his fire, all clean skin and sea salt and clean ocean. Must have come from Neverland then. The smell of the one person who has haunted his dreams of late does nothing to calm Axel's anger. How dare he, how dare Roxas offer this to him now, when he cannot be objective about it and when all he is capable of doing is ruining everything? Desperately, he raises a hand to fireball his friend, but Roxas sees it coming and grabs his wrist. The touch sends a bolt of heat straight through Axel's slim body and he wrenches free, breathing heavily. Sparks start to dance along his fingers and he gazes at Roxas from under lowered brows, panting heavily.

"Roxas?" he grinds out roughly.

"Y…yes?"

"_Run."_

Roxas, who is a foolish boy but not a stupid one, runs. Like a young rabbit he whirls on his heels and darts away, sprinting down the street and around a corner. Axel draws a great shuddering breath, and a slow feral smile spreads gradually across his face, crooked and hungry and predatory. He's pissed, he's frightfully aroused, and his legs are much, much longer than Roxas'.

He leaps into action, his strides eating up the ground like a great hunting cat's, and it is as if he can sense where Roxas is going as he flees blindly through the streets and alleys with their fake fronts and neon signs. The signs are like directional arrows to Axel, who follows unerringly. He's not even breathing hard, but Roxas is getting tired, and he is gaining fast. After what seems a ridiculously short time, he corners the boy in an alley and is upon him. His fingers fist in the smaller boy's coat and haul him forward, jerking him up on his toes. Roxas is frightened now. His fear is like sweet wine in Axel's mouth. God, it's good.

"Ah…ah Axel," pleads Roxas once, and then Axel smashes his mouth down and shuts him the fuck up. Roxas makes an inarticulate noise as the kiss bruises and cuts him a little. Axel tastes the faint tang of blood and snarls. He shoves Roxas back against the wall and presses his wrists to the bricks above his head. His head dips down to bite hungrily at Roxas' throat and collarbone. Roxas groans raggedly. Dimly, Axel is aware he's hurting him, but he has run his prey to ground and captured him, and he is incapable of reason anymore. God, the taste of him! At last. He thinks it's entirely possible he's going to incinerate both of them right here and now. Furiously, blindly, he tears at Roxas' organization coat, and his own. The boy's skin feels cool against his own feverish burn. It does nothing to cool his ardor, or his rage. There is a roaring sound in his ears as he tears away black leather pants, and he's not even capable of registering the fact that his victim is apparently just as aroused as he is. His hands fly like a blind man's over Roxas' skin. He can't feel enough of his prize. He knows he is muttering mindlessly, but he can't stop.

"Can't stop, Roxy. Too late. Kiss me again. Jesus. Fuck. You're so pretty. Mine now, sorry. Can't stop. Can't stop. God. Say yes Roxy, say yes."

To his immense startlement, because he's only peripherally aware of what he's saying and knows it doesn't matter whether Roxas say yes anymore anyway, he hears the boy's voice. It trembles, and is choked with fear, but his answer gives Axel the world on a shiny silver platter.

"Yessss. Axel. Yes."

He spins him around, uses his own spit to try to ready him at least a little. Roxas whimpers.

"Axel…hhnn…Axel!" he cries. Axel spins him back around and picks him up. Roxas' legs go around his waist as he cradles the boy's thighs with his burning hands and prepares to do what he has dreamed of for so long he can scarcely remember anything else.

"It's gonna hurt, Rox," he mutters, his face buried in Roxas' throat. "I can't…Jesus…I'm sorry. God. I can't…hng….Jesus you taste good…"

"Axel," whispers Roxas, and his hands with their keyblade calluses touch his face gently. "It's….okay…I want you to."

Oh god, the kid kills him. He lines himself up and he tries to be gentle, he really does, but he's too far gone for it really, and Roxas is so delicious he wants to just _eat _him. His little whines and mewls of pain do nothing to calm Axel's need.

"Oh god oh god. Roxas. Ah….try to…hnn…relax. I'm…ohgod…I'm sorry. I can't…._fuck_. I can't…stop. So fucking sweet. Gah. Let me…nnnn…Roxas!"

Roxas' tears are like a drug when he licks them away, and his arms around Axel are fantastic, and his hot breath as he gasps and pants in pain and fear are gorgeous to him. No, Axel thinks, I'm not a nice person. Not at all. Jesus, I'm going to die, right here, right now, and I don't care. This is….he's….

"Axel," whispers Roxas, his voice rough with tears. His hands fist in Axel's flame bright hair and jerk hard, pulling his head back. Axel's growl trickles out over his teeth and he knows his eyes are slits of mindless hunger as he gazes blindly at Roxas' face.

"Hhnn?" he says interrogatively, and his arms tighten around Roxas' thighs. Roxas leans in and kisses him softly. It is achingly soft, and causes Axel to slow the relentless assault of his powerful legs and hips driving himself into the smaller boy. Roxas' small teeth sinking into his bottom lip are sharp and sudden and startling, the flash of pain bright and sweet.

"Shut up," whispers Roxas. "And fuck me."

So Axel does. But this dirty gorgeous plea has rendered his rage a caged thing again, and there is loving in it now, and they find a rhythm that works for them, and Roxas' cries are soon not of pain anymore, and Axel's eyes are clear as new Spring grass, his gaze unerringly fastened on the aqua eyes that are his world now. They hurt each other, with nails and teeth and bruising grip, but it doesn't matter now, because this…oh this…it is so honest, so real, and Axel feels his heart…his _HEART_ beating in his chest like it will pound its way out and swallow him whole. It beats for Roxas, who is wrapped around him so tightly he has lost track of where one of them ends and the other begins.

When they stagger back to the castle together, bruised and bleeding and aching all over, he points to the flowers he has burnt to ash, and Roxas laughs. The sound resonates inside Axel like promises kept, and his anger is safely diverted for another day. They are still laughing like loons at his description of the look on Saix's face when he fireballed him earlier. They walk right past Roxas' room, arm in arm, and when Axel follows his lover into his own rooms, he glances back over his shoulder. At the end of the hall, in the shadows, Saix watches them. The expression on his face is unreadable. Axel's gaze doesn't flinch. After a long moment, Saix inclines his head once in a nod, and backs way, turning and disappearing into the darkness.

Axel pauses before he follows Roxas into his room. He still thinks he's being manipulated. He still thinks Saix is a toady and that Xemnas is leading them all down the road to hell, not salvation. He still thinks Xemnas knows this perfectly well too. He is still mightily afraid that there is something terribly wrong about Xion. But just now, with the scent of his lover on his own skin and the feel of his lover still making the palms of his hands tingle, he is a happy man. He doesn't think he could incinerate much of anything right now. Well. Maybe the hippopotamus. Because that thing is just wrong. He turns and follows Roxas, and sees him sprawled across Axel's bed, a very adult look on his face. His fingers stroke gently down his own throat, where Axel's teeth have marked him.

"Did I hurt you too much Rox?" he asks, as gently as he can, and sits hesitantly beside him.

"Just a little," says Roxas. "Is it…is it always like that?"

Jesus, the kid kills him. He swallows hard before he answers.

"Hm. Ah. Not always. But…Roxy…with me…it's….often….like that. I…um…I get it if you wanna back out now. I…."

"Axel?"

"Yeah?"

"Anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?"

And Roxas is on him and his mouth shuts Axel the fuck up and the kiss is sweet and tender and full of emotions neither of them are supposed to be capable of, and Axel knows with absolute certainty that this time, nothing's going to hurt at all.


End file.
